Today I bring to you, Frank Urban "Fuzzy" Zoeller, Jr., An American professional golfer who has won ten PGA Tour events including two major championships. He is one of three golfers to have won the Masters Tournament in his first appearance in the event. He also won the 1984 U.S. Open, which earned him the 1985 Bob Jones Award. All that's fine and dandy but I have an award I like to mount on his personal mantle. If you know what I'm talking about. And I think that you do.
To tell you the truth, I might not have ever notice Fuzzy if he hadn't made a racist remark regarding Tiger Woods at the 1997 Masters Tournament. The media really dug into him and he lost some sponsors. I didn't care about the comment because it to me it sound like he was really joking around. And after seeing Fuzzy for the first time, I want to dig into him. With my dick.
Of course he has a wife and kids. His passions include hunting, fishing and he enjoys all sports as well as golf course design. A plus. He also loves to cook and grill with his own line of BBQ and Steak Sauces as well as premium dry rubs. Another plus. He has also launched his own line of ultra-premium vodka, Fuzzy's Ultra Premium Vodka. Also a plus as I can get him drunk with his own stash so we could do some inebriated fun.
OK Fuzzy...
This'll only takes a couple of minutes, now grip the shaft of your club and bend over again.
Well Fuzzy… you look real comfortable like that, on your back with your legs in the air.
If you prefer it like that, I’ll accommodate you as I hope you’ll accommodate me.
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