Televangelists have had me conflicted since I was a teen. On one hand, they represent pretty much everything I hate (intolerance, homophobia, hypocritical sex scandals and financial cover-ups), but on the other hand, there so fucking hot to look at. From their suits, jewelry and overall charisma, they can be pretty damn sexy. And if you have an issue with them (given their stance on homosexuality), do what I do. Just imagine how much it'll piss them all off if they find out their a gay sex symbol :-). So lets get started.
#10 Billy Graham
This guy rose to celebrity status in 1949 with large indoor and outdoor rallies; sermons were broadcast on radio and television, some still being re-broadcast today. He's one of, if not the first televangelists I saw on TV. I remember reluctantly watching his annual Billy Graham Crusades at my grandmother's house and excusing myself to the bathroom for so relief. He's retired and like a hundred now, but I could work with his son Franklin, who followed in his footsteps.
You can keep those boots on Franklin and Billy can watch too.
#9 R. W. Schambach
Probably not as well known as others on this list, the late Schambach's television program, Power Today, can be seen on the DayStar Christian TV network as well as over the internet in streaming podcasts. A faith healer that I wouldn't mind him laying hands on me. He had a kind of swagger that makes me think he'd be great in bed. A real talker, which I love. A Jesus here and there and a shake of the ass to set you off.
#8 Morris Cerullo
The host of "Victory Today," Cerullo is a highly controversial figure, with concerns being raised about the manner and style of his fundraising practices in the developed countries to finance his mission work. I'd so work that big round head of his and his face. His fund-raising practices would be more controversial if he excepts my offer of a G for one night with me. It's not what you think, just a sermon... naked. Nothing else.
#7 John Hagee
You know I love the chubs, but the pear bottom Hagee only got on this list in the last five years or so for the fact that he's greyier now. The CEO of John Hagee Ministries, which telecasts his national radio and television ministry carried in the United States on ten television networks, including 62 high-power stations aired to more than 150 million households. He's a Texan and they make them big in Texas. Well, at least I hope.
#6 Jimmy Swaggart
I always had a soft (or hard?) spot for a guy who likes to keep his dick wet and Swaggart definitely did. His 1980s telecast was transmitted to over 3,000 stations and cable systems each week before sexual scandals with prostitutes in the late 1980s and early 1990s led the Assemblies of God to defrock him. Back then I didn't care for him, but now. If he still want to keep his dick wet, he can give me a call. I can keep my mouth shut (when needed).
#5 Pat Robertson
The host of The 700 Club, a Christian News and TV program broadcast live weekdays on the ABC Family Channel as well as on channels throughout the United States, and on CBN network affiliates worldwide. Robertson's media and financial resources make him a recognized, influential, and controversial public voice for conservative Christianity in the United States. And I'd preferably like to kept his voice silenced by putting my dick in his mouth, though he would disagree. Or would he? I'm pretty sure out of all the guys here, he'd be the most pissed about being on this list.
#4 Arnold B. Murray
The late Arnold Murray was the "pastor" of a church called the Shepherd's Chapel which is based in Gravette, Ark, with over 200 television stations carrying his ministry. Getting any information on Mr. Murray is very difficult. As he was rather private about his personal history and has refused to provide much biographical information about himself. And I've seen the word cult when describing his ministry. So I'll end this by saying 'I'd do his ass.'
#3 Oral Roberts
Founder the Oral Roberts Evangelistic Association and Oral Roberts University. The late Roberts was one of the best-known and controversial American religious leaders of the 20th century with his ministries reaching millions of followers worldwide, spanning a period of over six decades. His ministry was criticized by critics and supporters for his widely publicized funding appeals. On your knees, begging for money is not a good look. Or is it? Seeing him on his did kinda do it for me. And even though he's dead, he's another one with a son that I wouldn't like doing.
Richard's chubbier now, so I'd bend him over a table.
#2 Earl Paulk
The founder of one of the country’s first great independent megachurches in the Cathedral at Chapel Hill in Decatur, Georgia, a suburb of Atlanta. The late Paulk was also known for his lifelong crusade against racism, but with that being said. This guy was the shadiest of the shady with allegations of sexual misconduct, including several illicit relationships and accusations that he had molested children. Threesomes, whoring chicks out among other things. If it wasn't for the accusations of child molestation. He'd be at the top. I've got to do a later post just about him because DAMN he got a story to tell.
#1 Jerry Falwell
An evangelical Christian pastor, televangelist, and a conservative political commentator who founded Lynchburg Christian Academy (now Liberty Christian Academy) who had problems with Larry Flint and the Teletubbies. The late Falwell gets my top spot because he's a chub of course and a grade A dick. Sure there's other dicks on this list but their not on his level. I'd personally like to put him in a Tinky Winky costume fuck him like crazy on tape so I could give it to Larry Flint publish in Hustler. You know he's getting a solo post too.
P. S.
After seeing Jerry Falwell, Jr., if he got heavier. I'd sooo do him. And yes I see a pattern.
Having seen a lot of movies about the future, whether it be evil corporations taking over, the development of killer robots, or an environment ruined by man's hubris. Unfortunately for the people inhabiting this movie, all three have happened; it has been a bad century.
From the start, the movie feeding us morsels of details about how this world works and introduces us to our hero Tyson Keen (Paul Ganus). Tyson is making a delivery to a local TV station run by Lathan Hooks (the late great Ralph Waites of The Waltons and Carnivale), a vocal dissident of Unicom and their fascist ways. Tyson buddies up with Lathan’s 16-year-old grand-daughter Arren (Megan Ward), a tech wizard who instantly develops a crush on him. The rest of the cast of characters include Parice (Eva LaRue), a teacher who does an educational program; Winston Wickett (Rescue Me’s Jack McGee), a sleazy talk show host who only has a show because his father owns the station; Quinn (Bill Moseley), the company’s workman; and Sandra (Elizabeth Mclellan) and Christie (Katherine Armstrong), two prostitutes that are guests on Winston’s show. They all end up staying the night in the station (actually an old power station converted into a TV station) as a thermal storm comes in making it unbearably hot and dangerous to be outside.
During the night, a mysterious stranger kills Lathan and the group realizes one of their number might be a ruthless synthetic human. To find out who's who, they rip off of John Carpenter's "The Thing." That is right, cut everyone's finger to see who bleeds oil, but it does not work since the synthoid are full of fake blood. They could find an easier way, like noticing the two characters who never sweat in a hot ass station, even when everyone else is dripping wet! I noticed it, probably half the viewers noticed it. So, why didn't Tyson or Arren not notice it?
They finally catch on to the fake people and soon a game of cat and mouse is played out through the station's dark corridors. None of it should surprise you, especially not one of the hookers deciding to take a shower and being killed. Only when things look hopeless does our heros play their trump card, the DV-8. You know, that big robot featured prominently on the DVD cover. You spend the entire movie waiting for the DV-8 to do something cool, but soon become very disappointed. It walks about a hundred yards, lifts up a fallen girder, steps on the synthoid, then falls to pieces.
All signs indicate "Crash and Burn" should be a forgettable, disposable movie, but in spite of its flaws, it works quite well. It's a solid mix of cheese and moderate suspense, steals some concept elements from Class of 1999, The Terminator, Robocop, Blade Runner and The Thing to name a few. Oddly dubiously marketed as Robot Jox 2 (don't expect the fights of Jox) as it contains less than a minute of giant Robot action. "Crash and Burn" is a solid purchase for a b-movie freak, and a solid rental for everyone else.
Now with all that being said, I might be a bit bias because of real reason I watched this. Namely one Jack McGee who makes this movie for me. Jack's a lot heavier in this flic with nice shots of his sweaty chest and belly.
The scene where he's awakened by emergency alarms after sleeping with some hookers all sweaty and plump was nice.
The director could have treated us with a little sex scene with Jack like they did with the male lead. Sex scenes in a B movie is never a bad thing. Later, in another shirtless scene, he's tending a cut he received from the synthoid earlier in the film.
And another plus for the film is it has an appearance by ole pa Walton.
My only problem with the film was that it was made in in the early 90s. So the video quality isn't all that great. But if you look around, you can find some copies that have OK to good video quality. Strangely enough, the blooper reel on my copy has a better video quality than the actual film. Speaking of which, highly recommend watching if your a McGee fan (you probably are if your reading this) especially a heavier McGee fan. Well the entire film is for a heavier McGee fan.
So on one of my internet odyssey to find so hot ass daddies. Looking at the countless pictures of silver haired daddies and chubby grandpas, one little image drew my attention. So here for you delectation is none other one of the most famous figures in modern baseball, pitching legend Nolan Ryan.
Now if he was playing today, it would make baseball worth watching... possibly. Tall, handsome and he knows how to dress, Ryan certainly ranks as a daddy to behold. And as hot as I think he looks dressed, he's the type of former athlete that I want to see doing a spread in The Body Issue of ESPN The Magazine. I can see all that nude poses. Mmmmmm... Sorry, I was away there for a minute. The Hall of Fame Texan had a major league record 27- year baseball career pitching for four different teams: the New York Mets, California Angels, Houston Astros, and Texas Rangers.
So lets see, married with kids and currently an executive adviser to the owner of the Houston Astros. Yep. Had high velocity and stamina throughout his career, even into his 40s. So if I get the chance to ride 'The Ryan Express' (dreaming), it'll be a long ride.
Nolan Ryan definitely knows how to dress.
Look a that thigh. And he wear tasseled loafer.
***DADDY BONUS***
Even in just a pair of jeans looks incredible on him. Damn his wife is lucky.
